JP’s Rants

Today is a day to eat.  Today is a day for the family, to catch up and reflect, to laugh, have fun.  Did I mention pig out?  Did I mention my day will also consist of running to my inlaws house, then to my parental units house?  I honestly debate whether I would rather lay in bed and recharge the batteries.  I don’t have to do the marathon shopping day tomorrow, so maybe I can get some slumber in then.  I am going to catch some football at all costs at the inlaws, even if I have to wrestle with the kids for the remote. 

 I will not tolerate pokemon, I must see the Phins triumph!  Dont you know?  There is a man law about the tv being on football at all times.  I also want a law that you should be able to take your Thomas Turkey into the living room, none of this family sitting at the table crap!  lol.. I want my football, to pig out in peace… not hold hands and pray for the thanks for food speal… call it what you want… lol.. sorry, I have to go get in the shower, shave, look somewhat presentable (now that I am a grunt worker, is it cool to sport jeans and a button down?  Have I established myself as anti-white collar enough to blare my Bruce Springsteen tapes and talk about the man?!?!) and head to my mommy inlaw’s house.  I will sit with my hands neatly on the table, a bib in place (on me, not Ben) and make up witty topics at the dinner table.  I will chew my food quietly and laugh at lame humour.  I love turkey day, don’t you?

I didn’t, yeah, I did.  I have to say it was painful to peep at the least comments I wrote on this page.  I am sure it was not a lot of fun for anyone who read it either.  As I write many things have changed… I am back in the homestead and have a new baby boy, who might be the cutest dude in history (biiiiiased dad) and have managed to flip some of my addictive personality into working. I figure it is better to work yourself to death than swill it, and it is beneficial to people who depend on you, no matter how shaky the trust factor is.  

All I can think of for some reason on that comment is that lame Danny Bonaduce (wrong spelling) show he has on VH1… happen to catch 5 minuted of it one night, so lame.  I sometimes do not know what I am thinking when I pull hurtful antics, piss off loved ones and friends… it is definitely a selfish act.  I think I can establish that.  I guess I am lucky to have great family, and some close friends who care.  This is a touching piece isn’t it?  Doesn’t it bring a tear to your eye?  I should be talking about some Tommy Turkey and a lounge chair with my name on it, sitting like a slug and trying on the sin role of glutton and piglet. Anyways, just wanted to run out some thoughts and such, don’t know if anyone even reads this thing any longer… but oh well… till the next episode.

It is tough to pull a Lenny and be “Always on the Run”.  I probably have not typed anything on here in ages.  IN that time a lot of junk has been going down. Got the toss from the house, had a bunch of clothes in my backseat, and am currently a menace to society.  It is a tough shift all day to barhop and then hit hotels.  It is tough on the cash flow, since I also lst my job.  Isn’t booze a great thing?  Lost a part in a play, lost family contacts, and now run from place to place like a freaking nomad.  I finally got another job working for the sun for piss pay in the accounting dept.  I have not managed to lose the job yet, but it has only been a week.  I don’t know how much longer I can keep up the madness, the funds are sure to run out soon.  I can tell you it only gets stale when your sick as a dog.  I wonder if I am gonna end up selling my car and moving to begas to pull a Nick Cage soon.  I have not resorted to breaking out a liter of vodka in the shower in the middle of the night yet, but WITH A LITTLE EFFORT IT MIGHT BE POSSIBLE.  I definitely experince the drunk sick when I have to go in for an 8 hour shift.  It isnt fun to be sitting in your cubby feeling like yacking is eminent for 8 straight hours.  It is a chore.  Anyways, thought I would chime in.  I have no solutions yet (stop drinking you say?!?), so I guess this is it until later.  Hope all who read this are doing well.

I finished my show and now have nothing strenuous on the agenda.  You would think that’s a good thing, but not so in my book.  I have done some writing and caught up on some things, but there is definitely a void after the busy theater wave of the last couple of months.  I have tried to supplement it by watching every musical known to man, reading Eugene O’Neill’s plays from last to first, and listening to Broadway’s best on Sirius radio.  I also have the problem of lots of food and not enough activity.  I have been neglecting my gym membership quite a bit, making excuses when it is laziness that might be more the blame.  You can’t get on a Ben and Jerry’s pint a day habit and pig out for long without paying the price on the waistline eventually. 

            There has also been some alarming and not good family news lately, adding to the stress zone.  I never realized when one chip falls out of the machine, the whole computer is not functional… at least not as normal as it use to.  People take bad news in different ways and show it in others.  You have crying, distant looks, rage, and in my case internal combustion.  I am hoping everything works out in the end.  I guess you have to realize it is not in your hands in the end.  It is someone else’s or some other beings to decide what occurs.         

            In other news, I am enthused to be getting some writing done and with any luck I will have a productive session this Saturday collaborating on it.  I am hoping to put together a dueling acoustic thing: I also might write a music score of some type.  That’s the game plan anyways. 

            This rant didn’t have much point other than getting some murky gunk off my chest.  It was intended for myself, and did serve a purpose, if only for me.  Here’s to getting fat, writing tunes, neuroticism, stress, and no control. 

It is not going to happen.  I refuse to look at the weather on television or Internet, or even take a peek at the newspaper section that deal with our climate.  The people at work are abuzz with talk of a blizzard.  The number of inches has gone from a modest couple or dusting, to 100 inches of fresh powder pack.  The panic will set in quickly and the next thing you know the grocery stores are packed with people buying candles and bottled water by the palette load.  Yes, it is the perfect storm awaiting us tomorrow.

            Does anyone else realize that local news broadcasts have nothing, zilch, zip, nada, to broadcast that the general public gives two bits about besides the glorious weather?  If there is a chance for even a slight dusting, they have up to the minute radar and every thirty-second updates for us.  The weathermen at these stations live for winter and possible storms, and so do the newsrooms.  It kind of makes me want to puke.

            Warm conditions have been bestowed up CT through much of January, and I have loved every minute of it.  Some say if you don’t like the cold weather, get out of my state.  No thank you.  I want the heavy taxes and warm weather all wrapped up in a beautiful bundle: with fresh air, great attractions, and fine dining to go along with my mansion of a home on the cheap. 

            I don’t know where the last paragraph fits.  I guess I just don’t want snow to fall.  It is time for global warming to do a better job and microwave our state a bit more, causing 70-degree weather every day of the year.  People have places to be, and the plows seem to do more roadside sleeping than scraping, though now and again they take pride in spitting sand and salt mix all over my car as I pass by. 

            Governor Rell, please no more talk of car tax cuts.  I want an increase so we can build a statewide dome that acts as a large blanket to cover us from precipitation.  No more floods, plowing budget, or needless traffic accidents.  This new dome will let in sunlight, and keep out all blood-sucking bugs.  At nightfall, when there is a clear window of weather, we can open a hatch to let all the toxic pollution from cars and industry out in the sky, then retract and we start all over again.  Connecticut welcomes you; a sleepy, peaceful, climate-controlled, festive, go getter, historical wonder of the world. 

I had a busy weekend filled with plenty of events.  I did my usual shows down at the theater, and had an old friend come up from New York City for the Friday show.  I didn’t feel like I had much of a weekend to be honest.  I went from show to show and not much in between. 

            I did manage to get my taxes done on Sunday, the super bowl was pretty lame this year and I had no interest in it.  Can somebody explain why coverage has to begin at 7 am local time when the game doesn’t kick until somewhere around 6:30 pm?  Do I need that much hype and analysis?  How many bags of pretzels and popcorn can I gorge myself with by then and still be ok to watch? 

            I wonder what the supermarkets look like on a Sunday around 1 pm?  I think that day may be the only time you see a bunch of men perusing the different aisles of a grocery store.  Some men that really wanted to take it to the next level might have even gotten a shopping cart (mini or even the big beast with wheels).  I always end up having to go back to the front of the store and grab one, my hands becoming too full to continue the safari. 

            Some men like to complain about the grocery store.  I find once I have passed through the swooshing electric door, I have a need to scope out every aisle for steals and deals.  Maybe I need some pistachios, or how about some peppers?  I then make the rounds of all the specialty areas like poultry and seafood.  I hate seafood, but I need to see if there is anything interesting going on.  Maybe the lobsters are mounting some form of revolt in their aquarium of impending doom and have climbed out to take names. 

            When I finally get to the front, an old person has always made the mistake of venturing into this century and done the unthinkable, they go into self-checkout.  They proceed to have 399 pieces of fruit and veggies, which is followed by a “where’s Waldo action adventure game” of  “ guess the funny veggie” on the touch screen.  Coupons, bewildered looks, and the red light from hell follow.  A clerk is called for to assess the damage.  The bananas I had in the basket have rotted and I have to put them back.  Ah the grocery store, a true patience and fun experience.  Honey, are you going to the store?

            I got a late start on my busy day yesterday.  I had tons of ambition the eve prior: hit the gym, go to work, do my show, and grab a coffee with my friends afterwards.  It didn’t go as planned.  I woke up late, donned my workout garb, and bolted over to my parent’s house to grab my ipod.  I ended up slurping tea and procrastinating, running short of time to get to the gym.  I needed the workout, so as an alternative I went up to the track outdoors up across from Kelly middle school. 

            It might be a phenomenon, but with 32-degree weather or less I can run about half the laps I can with warm conditions.  I did some laps and impressed the elder ladies walking by as I closed with a big “Rocky 4 on the beach with Apollo slow-mo short shorts grunting” sprint to finish my run. 

            I got through work with only minimal damage from irate customers, who demanded to know answers to questions like, “Why do I pay 50 bucks for being one day late?” and “I…. I… already paid those last year!  Ten days on a check?  How long do you have to live in this town to have the privilege of writing a check”?  Being the smooth operator I am, I handled the customers with tact and grace, patiently answering every question and getting to the bottom of ones I didn’t have an answer for. I only wish they gave an employee of the month award out. I want my plaque to be emblazoned on the outside of town hall, a true local legend of customer service.

  My show went well.  I got back in the swing of things and somehow didn’t miss any lines.  I was pleased to see old friend from yesteryear Pistol Pete in the crowd, as well as Mike and Erik.  All three were in a section by themselves, ready to pounce on any mistake I made. 

            We met up and went to Tim Horton’s afterwards.  It is a big upgrade in interior decorating from the ole Bess Eaton that resided there.  I do miss the inscriptions of bible quotes on the cups though.  There are some weird folk and happenings at 11 in a coffee place.  You have the loners who sit and look as if this is the only place they have to go, others who look to be drying out, teenyboppers hanging out with the employees.  What happened to the good old days of using the parking lot as a beer-swilling hangout?  I must be aging and kids must be getting wiser, that or have parents that are more tolerant and let them booze at home.

  At any rate, I had a fun evening catching up with friends.  I always say I have to do it more often, and should.  Busy day tomorrow as well.  I hope it goes as smooth as today did.

Wednesday is one of the few days that I do not have anything going on after work. My wife Helen is at class and Nick (stepson) is with his grandmother.  I can go home and get some housework done (yeeeessss), or I can grab some ice cream and watch some tivo.  I decided to expand my horizons and head up to the Hartford Stage for a play. 

   I headed over to my parent’s house and asked my mom if she wanted to go, but she had a touch of the flu, so I braved the journey solo.  I have never been up to the Hartford Stage, but the directions seemed easy enough.  I got there with time to spare, got my ticket and headed into the theater.  I was quite impressed with the interior, the lighting and set design was beautifully done. 

   The play I saw was called, “A Moon for the Misbegotten”. It was the last play written by the legendary Connecticut native Eugene O’Neill.  I had just read the play so it was fresh in my bean, and I was not let down in any way by the performances.  The cast really brought the characters to life, and the whole experience was one which I thoroughly enjoyed.

  The whole night made me realize how many great things are available to see within a short drive.  People constantly whine about Hartford and surrounding areas, that nothing is going on.  I use to be one of them, content to grab a six pack and watch mindless television during the week.  Here’s an idea; look in the paper, scour the internet, and get out and see things. I only wish I had this revelation ten years ago.  

  I look forward to going to the Hartford Stage again soon for other shows in the future.  I want to bring some friends and maybe get some others excited about the same things I saw. Then again, there is the pint of cherry garcia in the fridge…..